Feed your baby however the fuck you want to
Why I'm so glad I made the decision to formula feed, the importance of realizing your opinion is the only one that matters, and the details on my two feeding journeys
Every time I talk about formula feeding my 9-month old baby on social media my messages are immediately flooded with other moms who either have questions about the decision/weaning process, want to show gratitude for “normalizing” formula feeding and showing the pros to it, or expressing the guilt/shame they feel over wanting to stop breast feeding. So, I figured why not put all of my thoughts in one place to lay out the details of my two feeding journeys and also remind you that YOU get to decide how you want to feed your baby, not anyone else. No one else’s opinion actually matters in this case (minus potentially your doctor in certain circumstances). Do not forget it!!!
All that matters is that your baby is fed. Whether you want to exclusively breastfeed them, combo feed, or formula feed from the beginning, it is up to YOU. You don’t need a “reason” to formula feed other than you WANT to. I realize that we’ve come a long way over the years in terms of shaming moms for this decision, but I still think there is room to go based on how many DMs I receive of women feeling guilt over choosing to feed their baby formula. Whenever I felt guilt about this topic or questioned my decision to stop breastfeeding either kid, I return back to this viral tweet:
Obviously this is an extreme and “personal statement”, but it encapsulates so many of my emotions over this. Truly… are you ever really able to tell the difference between a baby who was breastfed and a baby who was not? I sure as shit have not been able to. If you’re looking for some actual data, here is an article with Emily Oster on the matter. My key takeaway? ‘“But for kids, there’s really not anything in the data that’s strongly supported as a long-term benefit for breastfeeding,” Oster says.’
If you are someone who is battling with the decision and feel like breastfeeding just really isn’t for you (for whatever reason), and want to formula feed your baby but are beating yourself up with guilt, take this as a reminder to help you make that leap: you are an amazing mom, your ability to mother your baby is not defined by the method of feeding you choose, and if formula feeding allows you to show up as a more present, happier, and loving mother, than that is a huge win.
To go into my journey for anyone who is potentially in the thick of it right now, let’s rewind…